Archive

Interrupting the Chud-O-Sphere

The department of justice is disrupting the disrupting space of right wing disruption. Say a prayer for Political Party A.

The Prophetic Sausage Surge

A Boar's Head facility is found to be disgusting. Feds hit L+R+A+Start on their case against Trump. Hasbro has a new book just for you. Texan sausage desire is an economic metric.

All-You-Can-Eat Police

A woman learns the extend of an all-you-can-eat special. Twitter is very heavy. Breonna Taylor still needs justice. Google unleashes destructive imagination.

Nvidia’s Heist Episode

Nvidia pulls off an art heist. An 11 month update of the siege on Gaza. Google demands your friendship. I want to send files across the globe.

2.9 Billion Person Data Leak

A near record-breaking data breach happened. San Francisco has a continuing X-odus. The Beast from within is emerging. Disney announced a sequel or two.

The Biden of Bad News

An old man wrote a letter to the nation. An HR company learns the difference between humans and resources. A promising HIV drug trial completes. Texas is gonna get a bit more Musky.

Rain Snakes & Guilty Pleas

People really dislike AI. Boeing admits to doing a whoopsie. Two gods duke it out. Women deserve better.

A Year on Mars

Europe has some elections. Clothing may be more easily recycled because science. Some folks just stepped out of Mars. An old man refuses to step out from behind the wheel.

DELL-icious Drama

Workers at Dell make a statement. France is in the "find out" phase of colonization. TikTok has some words for the US Government. Two old men will have a chat this week.

The Legacy Continues

The Titan Submersible is back in the conversation. The largest payout in history may go to the largest creep in history. Some dude was found guilty.

I Do Not Recall

Tech companies are totally on top of what people want. French protestors push back against more road. Elon Musk would like a few dollars. The US says the ICC are the bad ones.

Once Upon a Time in Tasmania

A reminder that we're specks in a system of chaos. A rare chance to hear a rare album. TikTok's looming end date sparks a technical challenge. The US is desperate to make Israel look good.

PayPal's Bathwater

The world of AI is about as on fire as always. We're looking at our first Millennial Saint. PayPal got a nice loan from Belle Delphine. The US is wondering where everyone went.

I Climbed Mt. Everest

A few humans did some pretty astonishing stuff recently. Other one did some pretty garbage stuff. Turns out, the internet is kinda okay. Also, wife bad.

Wrath of the Sun

The sun remains a deadly laser. Rich folks surely pay their fair share. US cops do what they do best. Tinder bows to Hinge, but Match wins regardless.

How The SKHausage is Made

A behind-the-scenes look at how I put together the weekly Stuff Keeps Happening newsletter! This process has evolved quite a bit since the last time I shared it, so here's that.

All Rabbit, No Hat

A very unimpressive Rabbit makes its debut. Boeing is running out of whistleblowers. Google would prefer AI over employees with morals. G7 countries are concerned about Israel's feelings getting hurt.

Ring in the Refunds

The FTC is issuing a few refunds. It's Deja Vu for the Weinstein trial. ByteDance is not keen on selling TikTok. Boeing is a very safe place for safe people (lie).

Inhumane Products

The Ai pin truly is inhumane. Boeing is a paragon of safety. Google fired employees for having a basic conscience. The Vision Pro is not the loveliest thing to use during travel. Stardew Valley gets, somehow, another update.

Total Eclipse of Women

The Moon and the Sun are about to fight. McDonald's is very sowwy. Discord shattered a world record. Blue Checkmarks are hiding in the shadows. You may luck into becoming a digital homeowner. EA wasn't feeling supportive.

I Am No Fool

This post has no gags in it. Be careful when sending dentist selfies. Facebook had their own ghostbusters. AT&T doesn't know how all that data got there. A 9-year-old wants to go to school.

Bit of a break, but back on Monday

SKH will return on... oh no...

Walled Garden of Eden

Apple is pulling some next level bullshit. A beloved internet production studio is kill. A message in a bottle returned after 40 years. The US SOTU happened and I would have preferred to forget. TikTok is on the chopping block again.

An Update on Stuff Keeps Happening

Stuff Keeps Happening will be changing a bit, hopefully for the better!

Four Day Work Week When?

The four day workweek still looks mighty fine. Florida's surgeon general is playing real world Pandemic. Robert F Kennedy's AI is already offline. A short ceasefire is somewhat on the table.

A Leap of a Day

One woman made college free for hundreds of students. Mitch McConnell is retiring a century late. Stardew Valley gets a patch soon. Your allergies may one day be history.

ShagGPT

We learned more about the effects of Long COVID on the brain. Alabama's supreme court made the dumbest possible choice. ChatGPT is soooooo randumb lol, so lets bring it to Tinder.

I Too Am Artificially Intelligent

Too much AI bullshit. An airline trusted AI too much and now has to pay up. Reddit decides to sell their user content to AI companies for peanuts. OpenAI missed the point of Oppenheimer. Russia likely killed a prominent dissenter.

Wizard Crimes & Soapy PR

Harry Potter was nearly arrested. The Ocean gets an oil change. The US is seeking to send about $100 Billion in aid to wars. Disneyland Cast Members seek to unionize.

Joe Biden's Vision Pro

Graffiti in LA is a "worldwide issue" according to the cops. Apple doesn't want your spatially-rendered dingaling. The United States is facing a serious POTUS problem. Israel is now bombing Rafah.

Fifty Airplane Holes

Boeing has some holey airplanes. Disney makes an epic investment. John Fetterman draws progressive ire. Taylor Swift pulls and Elon Musk.

Gobbling Knobs with Norman Reedus

We pulled a rodent out of a stump to predict the weather. Farmers in the EU have made their voices heard. Hideo Kojima attacks me, specifically. The US is jealous that someone else likes drone strikes.

Penis Cops

TikTok is at the intersection of bad ideas and bad negotiations. Trans folks are still being targeted with aggressive laws across the US and beyond. Tech CEOs testified once again to congress, this time about the kidlins.

In Which We Study Women

The male gaze is put to the test. Biden doesn't know how to read the room. Endometriosis is a very real nightmare. Twitter had another Twitter moment. Now, about the moon…

I Got COVID But Stuff Still Happened

An update on my COVID situation and how its gonna affect Stuff Keeps Happening for a smidge.

SKH: Rona Edition

I'm sick but heres links

I Am A Smug Newsletter Publisher

Substack is having trouble explaining why its okay to host Nazis. An airplane decided to express itself mid-flight. Tetris has finally been bested by human hands. The documents around Epstein's case have finally released.

Icelandic Volcano 2024

A volcano threatens an entire Icelandic town. Colorado supreme court rules that Trump can't be on their 2024 ballot. Spider-Man game developers were hit by a massive hack. And this is my last newsletter of 2023!

Attack of the Female Presenting Nipple

Boobs remain hotly contested on Twitch. Google Maps was a narc. The team at WOTC who helped kickstart Baldur's Gate 3 is wiped out. Threads is opening up a bit. Also its WINDY outside.

Hasbro Failed Their CON Save

There is a concerning amount of science happening. Hasbro isn't feeling the spirit of the holidays. E3 is officially actually for realsies dead. Google was found guilty.

Goober Reel: December 11th, 2023

Thank you for subscribing to Stuff Keeps Happening! Here is the Goober Reel for the December 11th, 2023 episode of SKH.

Israel's Unprecedented Statistics

They lost and then found a space tomato. Retail corporations lied about theft. The US FDA approved a new sickle cell treatment. The government of the US continues to support genocide in Gaza.

1.24 Million Cheese Wheels

Governments are asking Apple and Google to hand over your notification data. Baldur's Gate wins Game of the Year, again. Twitch is pulling out of South Korea. Google released a new AI and it is… fine?

Introducing the "Goober Reel"

Bonus content is abound as we say hello to the Goober Reel

Yep, Still Dead

The 23andMe hack remains absurd. Henry Kissinger is still dead. A massively anticipated trailer finally released. ChatGPT makes laws now. WaPo staff plan to walk off the job.

A Podcast, A Convention and An Update

It's been a minute, huh? I don't like waiting this long in between communications. So how about a little bonus blog kinda thing, yeah?

A Different Type of Green Peace

Apple is bringing RCS support to iOS but you will still be green. Also, Elon Musk is a horses ass, Democrats turn on their own base, a robot is already deciding our fate, an a sorta-kinda war broke out in the past.

Fire Doesn't Go There

A lot of fire thought it was a car, Iceland is about to erupt, Tesla pissed off Swedish workers, an update on the situation in Gaza, and a worldwide milestone was crossed.

I Am Not Lion To You

A lion went for a casual evening stroll downtown. Also, Apple settled a discrimination lawsuit, some carjackers picked the worst possible target, NYC mayor Eric Adams lost his phone to the FBI, and the beginning of the end of a famous protest.

How About Carless Drivers?

The actors strike has concluded as SAG-AFTRA has reached a deal with employers. Also, Meta seems to be intentionally preying on minors, an airplane had less windows that most would prefer, a robo-taxi company recalled their whole fleet, and a docked ship left its mark.

A Gilded Throne

We got new SPACE PICTURES. Also, some art thieves made a mess and got caught, a traffic stop escalates quickly, US election results are in, and a look at an inspiring general strike.

Classic Yeomanry Artifact Heist

The stranded sheep has been saved! Also, a museum heist goes down just as you wish it would, science people did research on how your nose smells things, protests around the world call for a ceasefire, and remember to mind yourself in the King's forest.

My Kind of Law Enforcement

The only good kind of law enforcement was cited by the bad kind of law enforcement. Also, corporate realtors got got, NYC's mayor is under an increasingly public investigation, the crypto golden boy was guilty on all counts, and we sent a probe to Mercury.

Three Tentative Dubs

The United Auto Workers have some tentative big wins. Also, a shooting that thankfully did not happen, a Republican plan for aid to Israel, a headline that I truly cannot believe exists, and a couple of small-time play premieres.

I Am In Another Castle

A sheep is like, really really stuck. Also, Panera's lemonade may have killed someone, a ninth grader made a cancer-fighting soap, the White House has some tepid opinions on AI, and that time when Quebec nearly declared sovereignty.

CEOs are a Dime a Dozen

An update on the dudes who stole millions of dimes back in April. Also, the United Auto Workers strike grows further, US House Republicans burn through yet another nomination, the UN Secretary General calls for a ceasefire, and a look back at those beautiful rolling hills on your desktop.

Very Normal Things, Truly

A house was demolished on accident while the owner was away. Also, Canada is looking into UBI, a judge was fired for pointing a gun at someone in court, Reddit may pull out of search results, and a slightly successful device launched in 2001.

Do We Really Need More Arms?

The Doc Ock suit is real because we must construct our own demise. Also, Twitter's traffic is hella down, the US Speaker situation deepens, Biden wants $105 Billion for war, and a fancy building opened up.

Battle Bots, But Not Like That

Twitter is finally going paid-only. Also, we still don't have a Speaker of the House, the CIA had a bit of a whoopsie on their social profile, a devastating event is unfolding in Gaza, and a land purchase by the US is contested to this day.

Do Not Speak of the House

A Georgia man received a million dollar speeding ticket. Also, Australia said "no" to giving representation to indigenous people, the US House of Representatives is still a complete disaster, Israel is continuing their assault on the people of Gaza, and a French royal didn't quite make it.

Yet Another Big Day

Science people did some really cool space stuff and I'm just really happy for them. Also, the UAW strike is expanding, US Republicans are doing the political equivalent of the cha-cha slide, and our favorite unhinged emperor makes another appearance.

United Auto Dubs

The UAW strike continues with some promising forward movement. Also, RFK Jr is running as an Independent, a TikTok ban in the US still looms large, the realest among us says goodbye to this life, and a quick reminder of what a difference a decade makes.

A Whole Lot of Booty

23andMe suffered a massive user data breach. Also, Gavin Newsom kills the vibe, Bandcamp's future is quite unknown, we've got more evidence that UBI is a good idea, and I've got another lead on some treasure lost at sea.

Celestial Showdown

An eclipse is on the way! Check it out, but wear eclipse glasses. Also, a new Meta AI is generating some interesting stickers, Kaiser Permanente workers are on strike, the Biden Administration is facilitating more border wall construction, and a little known app was founded in 2010.

The Elder of Air

The raddest among us jumps out of an airplane. Also, a US congressman's car is stolen, the FCC issues a space pollution fine, Elon Musk caused an innocent family to flee their home, and a little satellite begins its orbit.

New Supporter Benefit: Credits in Videos

Let's get your name in LIGHTS

Not Quite Closing Time

The US Government isn't shutting down... yet. Also, mRNA vaccine researchers win a Nobel Prize, OneWheels are about as dangerous as they look, Japan is using hellish robot wolves to scare off bears, and let's take a moment to check in on the year.

A Beary Good Picnic

US Senator Diane Feinstein has died at the age of 90 while still serving in office. Also, Google is killing off even more products, a bear has a taste for quality food, the US government may shut down quite soon, and maybe you should avoid Lockheed-built aircraft.

Strikes Keep Working

The Writers Guild have reached a tentative contract agreement with executives. Also, Ford is blaming the UAW for why they need more subsidies to build stuff, the FBI is investigating Baton Rouge's cops and Elon Musk totally lied about animal abuse from Neuralink.

More Popes Than You'd Expect

The price of a very specific oil is skyrocketing. Also, Unity is promising changes but people aren't optimistic, Microsoft has suffered a couple of massive leaks, AI isn't really winning all our hearts, and lets imagine a Pope cage match.

Picking The Scab Works

A possible leap forward in the fight against COVID has been discovered. Also, watch out for dangerous kids having fun playing music, Drew Barrymore did an about face, the US Military lost a literal fighter jet, and a reminder that "compromise" is not inherently moral.

Who Really Drives Profits

The UAW is kicking off a historic strike. Also, Unity's situation continues to fester, I finally talk about some alien stuff, Bill Maher is also a scab but we knew he was a shitty dude already, and we got TANKS now.

Some of my Sources & Why I Use Them

A look at some of the sources I use when producing Stuff Keeps Happening, along with some thoughts about the quality and use cases of each source.

Drew Barrymore is a Scab

Drew Barrymore is a scab. Also, Drew Barrymore is a scab, Drew Barrymore is a scab, the new iPhone has USB-C, Drew Barrymore is a scab, Unity is doing some really dumb pricing changes, and massive flooding has devastated Libya.

A Very Thirsty Computer

A massive earthquake has shaken Morocco. Also, training chatty AIs takes a real toll on natural resources, Google is rolling out shiny new tracking software in Chrome, and today may not be the best day to do an "on this day" gag.

A Tort in Time

Biscuit the Tortoise is safe and we should celebrate that daily. Also, Elon Musk thinks himself a private general, a Florida man tried to hamster wheel his way across the Atlantic, the UAW strike is very possible, and a pretty big statue unveiling.

"AirBnB" Implies The Existence of Earth, Water and Fire BnBs

A driver survived a 100ft cliff drop and 5 days stuck immobilized. Also, Mitch McConnell's potential possession, AirBnB essentially banned in NYC, TikTok's shiny new data center and a central hub for witches.

Privacy? Never Heard Of It

Among one of the larger "oopsies" this year has hit the store shelves. Also, Texas is the latest state to wanna know your porn habits, Burning Man has gotten pretty soggy, the NYPD is doing NYPD shit, and a Very Large Fire was stopped by explosions.

Think of the Children?

Australia is going to look away from the porn you're watching. Also, Elon Musk wants your biometrics for vague reasons, Texas is continuing their streak of being absolute dogshit for human rights, Instagram may be messing with their Reels format, and a Confederate general that was a "huge mistake".

Where's My Castle on the Moon?

We've got a new Lady of Carbisdale Castle. Also, India will discover that the moon is haunted, Gabon's military has taken control, someone stole money from a very high up box, and a porcupine was shipwrecked.

Charity Fundraiser Result & Scheduling Update

A quick update on fundraising & scheduling

I'm Going To Talk To You About Pangolins Now

A British Museum worker missed the memo. Also, we can regrow teeth apparently, a pangolin trafficking ring has been toppled, and a real life warlock who probably wasn't actually a warlock.

Auto Workers Disapprove

United Auto Workers may go on strike in the US as soon as next month. Also, he got indicted for a fourth time, a Texas woman wins $1.2 billion in a revenge porn lawsuit, Maui asks for aid and less tourists, suing Montana actually kinda worked, and a big ol' undersea cable.

We Found the Moana Force

We may soon learn more about a possible fifth fundamental force. Also, SBF is headed to jail, the Sackler family is not out of the woods quite yet, record labels are suing the Internet Archive, and I found some real passionate Wikipedia drama for ya

A Not So Super Conductor

Turns out the world economy is not about to be overturned by a revolutionary superconductor. Also, Maui is engulfed in flame, a UK minister would like to weaken encryption, Africa's future may be at a turning point, and its the first day of an old, old calendar.

Maybe Don't Use Zoom Actually

A car parked where you're really just not supposed to park a car. Also, Zoom wants to use video of you to train an AI, Ohio voters decisively shut down a bad faith issue, a recap of the Battle of Montgomery, and a few years in the woods.

Blue Eyes Black Lotus

We finally heard back from our dear spacecraft. Also, a massive trading card heist that wasn't particularly exciting, Elon promising the world when he'd prefer to leave it, I can hear you type your password, and let's talk about a pretty neat lady.

The Labor Implications of Shaking it Off

A bronze age arrowhead that came from outer space. Also, Taylor Swift has a decision to make, Lizzo's lawsuit is pretty wild, working from home is actually good for the economy, and a very good pencil boy.

The NEW! Nintendo Switch XL Plus 2

We uh... lost contact with the Voyager 2. Temporarily, at least. Also, Nintendo's Switch 2 rumors, MrBeast sues his burger people, the situation in Niger is continuing to heat up, and we signed a document.

Digitally Shipwrecked

Threads is hemorrhaging users already. Also, there's an ongoing coup attempt in Niger, the Pentagon is not happy about a major security breach, Sam Altman wants to fix humanity by further exploiting the poor, and today marks the start of a very good pirate game.

Why Can't I Hold All These Indictments?

Trump indicted yet again with even more in the pipeline. Also, Michigan bans conversion therapy, Tesla continues to lie about their cars, Reddit's CEO gets a strong message from users, and thank you Mr. Worldwide

A $30 Billion W

A crane caught fire and collapsed in Manhattan. Also, the Teamsters got a huge bag, your thoughts are increasingly unsafe, a look at the ongoing writers/actors strike, and a noteworthy premiere.

Xee you on Xe Other Xide

An unbelievably hype corn field find. Also, welcome to Xwitter, Florida wants to tell kids that Black people benefited from slavery, Netflix's stock plummet, and a bloody battle in Scotland.

KOSA Thought Dump

Some initial collected thoughts about KOSA

Hundreds of Goobers; Nary a Brain Cell

It is time to celebrate Golden Retrievers. Also, Texas needs to calm the hell down, the cartoon people are trying to unionize, the US Fed launches instant money transfer, Russia is shelling Ukrainian food exports, and the day we set foot on the moon.

Electing to do Crimes

We're making continuous strides in Alzheimer's research and treatment. Also, Trump is again being investigated while fake electors are charged, email typos lead to leaked military documents, a man and his dog were save from shipwreck, and Rome was a little bit very on fire.

A Quick Thank-You

For realsies.

These Legs Don't Break

A dude nearly broke a biking record but instead broke a bone. Also, America loves a good war crime, Tennessee's trans care ban may happen after all, Canada finds that emoji are legally binding, and one man who just won't die.

A Long History of Bread Innovations

A $600,000 wine heist has my attention. Also, a look at the unrest in France, Threads makes its debut (Elon is totally taking it well), a judge says the Biden admin stopped a free speech, and we are out here innovating on bread.

Weaving the Threads of Fate

A bit on the lighter side today, kinda. It's not a recession. Teens have never seen porn and will never see porn. Meta is soon launching a Twitter competitor. Jeff Bezos made a website.

I Just Wanted To Talk About Octopus Dreams

Reddit still doesn't care about blind people. Also, Twitter imploding on itself, 200 new laws in Florida, the US Supreme Court is serious garbage, and oops, it's Idaho.

Arthur Morgan's Magic Cards

South Korea got a little younger. Also, the Supreme Court reminds us how garbage they are, a man tried living on a rock in the ocean, science gets a bit wavy, and the Pinkertons are at it again.

A 25 Year OOF

A whoopsie-doodle that set research back 25 years. Also, the very fancy court makes decisions, audio evidence of Trump's crimes dropped, Island Nations prepare for the worst, and a meteorite fell on a—uh—it taught us a lot, at least.

Lets' Play Sports in 250 A.D.

We found a very old Mayan city with a sports complex. Also, Dark Amazon rises (and is sued by the FTC), Musk isn't paying employee bonuses, Hunter Biden pleads guilty, and the very cold place is off limits.

The Sun Demands It

Billionaires built their own deep sea death trap. Also, AI companies are still just Tech companies, the climate is on trial, a judge steps in to block Arkansas transphobia, and a confusing day for a Spanish garrison.

I Would Like Armor And Spikes, Too

We found a new old lizard. Also, it's Juneteenth, Texas is pulling some legal bullshit, Reddit is pulling some techno bullshit, and looking back, England pulled some... well, colonization bullshit.

Extras: What's Going On with Reddit?

Literally what is even going on...?

Support & Community

Let's chat a bit about sustaining Stuff Keeps Happening! And a big ol' THANK YOU for being here.

I Am A Wannabe Dictator

BMI is bullshit and now that's official. Also, synthetic human embryos can exist now, a horrifying yet not uncommon tragedy off the coast of Greece, Fox News copies my vibes and a look back at a historic uprising.

Reddit's Going Wackadoo

A portion of I-95 collapsed causing the traffic to remain terrible. Also, Reddit is losing its damn mind, a former president pleas not guilty again, the FTC is beefing with Microsoft, and congress injected a diety.

Twitter's Nasty Side Dishes

A cool cool dad made an accessible theme park. Also, Tesla's Autopilot is pretty deadly, Boris Johnson peaced out, Twitter pays even fewer of its overdue bills, and that time we said skin color shouldn't be a limiting factor in marriage.

BIG Day for Nero

Canada is still very much on fire. Also, Trump indicted on federal charges, the Supreme Court did something okay, Reddit's baffling decisions leave blind folks up shit creek, and a big day for Nero.

This Bill Sucks, Get Rid Of It

Trans rights remain very much human rights. Also, a dam in Ukraine crumbles, Cop City gets a grant from the council, a spy has die, and Port Royal just kinda sank.

Pickled Justice

A study finds a huge advancement in lung cancer treatment. Also, get out of jail if your friend is a cop, a school district sues big tech, your reality will soon be a bit more mixed, and a good pickle hunts slavers.

Student Debt Relief Ping Pong

A large group of old people decide that young people should remain poor. Also, who even needs journalism when you have ZUCC, the debt ceiling gets a popcorn finish, AI may be covering up war crimes and Rome got got.

Pita Bread and Arson

Sherlock encounters his strangest mystery yet. Also, AI people say AI will kill us, we've set a NEW SPACE RECORD and Canada is pretty on fire.

Felony Levels of Nasty

A senior prank ends in felony charges. Also, the debt ceiling talks have ended, it's Memorial Day, and you've got spies in your group chat.

Wireless Legs

Medical science brings us wireless legs. Also a hundred gigs of Tesla documents, a fascist is sentenced to prison, and TikTok is trying to figure out how to cram AI into the app.

A Deeply Cursed Announcement

Someone tried to move into the White House the wrong way. Also, DeSantis is planning an announcement, a Mexican volcano is getting spicy and the stock market is easier to manipulate than you might think.

40% Shredded Used Diapers

This new concrete is kinda shitty. Also, Jeffrey Epstein reportedly blackmailed Bill Gates, Meta is working on a Twitter competitor, and Nebraska is the latest state to vote on how much they hate women.

No Tears In My Kingdom

The FCC may finally be able to do anything, maybe. Also, trans rights are human rights, Tears of the Kingdom is selling absurdly fast, Montana banned TikTok and is already being sued for it, and more.

Let's Play COVIDeo Games

Your DNA can be taken from the air around you, which is cool and horrifying. Also, Rudy Giuliani hit with a huge lawsuit, ex-Apple employee indicted, and time for Long COVID gamer moments

Totally Not Labor Violations

Starbucks is really going for some new labor law violation records, Elon continues to learn the hard way, Southwest pilots eye a strike, and Google's AI loves slurping user data

Ad Block Block Block

ZELDA IS OUT TODAY. Also, YouTube wants to block ad blockers, the FDA may allow prescriptionless birth control, Microsoft doesn't think raises are necessary, and we're taking a closer look at your genes.

Extras: "Hypocrisy & Anger"

Today, I'm talking about a common theme we see in news / politics discourse, and why I try pretty dang hard to avoid veering in to that territory when delivering updates and such.

Powered by Wine and Lollipops

And old man (and former head of state) has been found liable for assault. Also, Spotify is dealing with AI producers, a woman survived in the wilds off of wine and candy, Tucker Carlson has a new home and more.

I Am The King of Pasta

Someone dumped hundreds of pounds of pasta in a forest. Also, an old man says to call him "king", Moderna prefers profits over living humans, an exoplanet might just dunk on our science, and more.

Extras: "Depression is Bizarre"

Here is another Quick Aside, in which I talk about my experience with The Big Sad and how strange it is to navigate, especially in ongoing circumstances.

DeSantis Bit By A Mouse

They're making an Avatar: The Last Airbender movie but aged up. Also, Disney is suing DeSantis, yet more tech layoffs, Montana trans bullshit is going down and have you seen these SWEET DEALS?

Extras: "Basically A Cult"

Wondering why tech bros are so loud? Wondering why massive tech CEOs have the wildest takes? Let's take a bit to chat about that.

I Am The New Tucker Carlson

The cop who killed Breonna Taylor has a new gig! Also, some guys named Tucker Lemon and Don Carlson lost their jobs I think, your AI friend would like a word with you, Sonic has a new union and more.

I Would Walk 500 Miles

The Proclaimers will not be at the coronation because they supported the interruption of the proclamation. Also, Twitter mishaps, Supreme Court non-decisions, expensive AI hardware and more.

I've Poisoned Your Cheesecake

We arrested some Nazis for setting stuff alight. Also, the FBI still doesn't like encryption, Twitter finally drops old blue checks, an attempted murder-by-cheesecake, Imgur goes full Tumblr and more.

Extras: "Separation" - A Quick Aside, April 20th 2023

Hello, dear readers! It's time for another Quick Aside. I changed up the format ever so slightly, mostly because I am quite tired.

Mouse Brains in Shocking Clarity

Lemme tell ya, we can really REALLY look at mouse brains now. Also, stop shooting people, video game accessibility is neat, Twitter does not care about trans people, Amazon is butthurt and more.

Artificial Human Resources

Companies love AI because it optimizes numbers while ignoring humanity. Also, Montana likely to ban TikTok state-wide somehow, Google is spooked about AI, even more shootings and more. And yet, I remain excited for the new Zelda.

Two Million Dimes

Someone stole two million dimes form a truck full of dimes. Also, massive intelligence leaks, super old politicians wont quit, NPR and PBS are out of Twitter, the CashApp founder was not randomly murdered, and more.

Extras: A Quick Aside, April 13 2023

I've kicked off a new (ish) bonus vlog series called "A Quick Aside," exclusive to patrons and paid subscribers of Stuff Keeps Happening. This is a sorta behind-the-scenes series mixed with general outlooks, upcoming plan previews, etc.

We Are All Lofi Girl On This Blessed Day

We got Lofi Girl Lore that we definitely didn't deserve. Also, more shootings, a giant trash fire, thousands of pounds of toxic dirt spilled, a sentient gun and more.

Ancient Cave Hallucinations

ChatGPT hallucinated the opposite of reality and now is being sued. Also, the Mario movie is breaking records, Musk doesn't know what NPR is, cavemen used to get super high, Apple is trying hard to prevent more unions and more.

Simply Don't Get Shot

Clarence Thomas "failed to report" hundreds of thousands of dollars in gifts. Also, Elon Musk has compromising videos of you, a ton of actual bullshit against trans folks, Tennessee lawmakers show their true selves and more. But hey, at least the Mario Movie is out

Quantum Presidential Arrest

Trump has been arrested becoming the first former president to do so. Also, Tennessee lawmakers are pulling some bullshit, the EU is having Nintendo repair stuff forever, we did SCIENCE and VR is not as gripping as we thought

Starbucks Really Hates Its Employees

Just a WHOLE LOT of blatant workers rights violations across the board. Also, RIP Sonic & E3, a torrent of dumb Twitter stuff, Iranian women are dope... and really all women are dope.

Very Normal Accidental Bombings

New Zealand's sailors are like "nah bro". Also, some Swiss residents had a very bad day because of the US, RIP to a beloved singer, same sex marriage takes a leap forward, and we've got ourselves a speaker!

Trump's Indictment, But Also Trash Spiders

Trump claims he was "INDICATED". Also, Google shredded evidence, a giant trash spider has appeared, OpenAI has been asked politely to not, the Pope ain't in the best way, and more.

BSA stands for Bankrupted by Sexual Assault

The Boy Scouts of America literally did so much sexual assault that its bankrupting them. Also, we made a mammoth meatball, Chipotle is a union buster, we got a look at some Zelda gameplay and more

$24 Billion, just *POOF*!

Twitter is not worth as much as it was sold for. Also, Levi's would rather not have to pay models, cops are still in less danger than teachers, some tigers got loose in Georgia, a tornado leveled a town, and the Pope's drip is not real.

A Lock Of Beethoven's Hair

We sequenced Beethovens genome and oops he had hep-B. Also, Soulja Boy crypto charges, Counter Strike 2 is a thing, a hospital has chosen to opt out of delivering babies, Biden's approval rating ain't great and more.

That Is Not Where Mountain Lions Go

You really should keep an eye out for them. Also, LAPD with the own goal. COVID origins further explored. School service workers strike, and I gush about a video game for a bit.

Mercurial Permafrost

Who needs a mortgage when you have Magic? Permafrost melting may be creating literal poison. Some old man said a thing on the internet. Wyoming doubly hates women. Google wants to win the "who had the shittiest layoffs" award.

Biden Announces Election Loss Any% Run

The Valve Steam Deck is 10% off right now which is super great. The rest of the stuff that is happening is far, far less super great than that, so let's just focus on the Steam Deck, yeah? No? Fine.

What About Artificial Stupidity?

Biden approves a massive oil drilling project. The A got a bit more I. Google is doing the thing they do best. You're gonna see a bunch of outrage about nothing. Meta would prefer to just not have employees, and we say goodbye to some good games.

FDIC Insured Daylight

Silicon Valley Bank failed, but we still saved daylight. The next big AI thing is gonna drop soon. You can apparently accidentally unlock the wrong Tesla. Twitter is charging absurd prices for their worse API. Also an asteroid probably wont hit us but you never know!

Illegal Beef

The beef claimed to be British but that was a lie. Mitch McConnell fell lol. The roman artifact was maybe not so phallic? Tesla steering wheels are falling off again and a literal heist went down in Chile.

What time is it on the moon?

The moon may need a time zone. Cop city protests escalate further. Elon Musk is going for world record on assholery. The French are doing their thing. Biden might be putting migrants in cages again. But hey, a long awaited game sequel comes out this year!

Royal Exoskeleton Ping Pong

Exoskeletons to help improve mobility for those who need it. CPAC happened but who cares. Crypto director of engineering pleads guilty to bad money stuff. Companies track a dangerous amount of information. Detective Pikachu makes a return.

Yes, Starbucks Busts Unions

Starbucks did "egregious and widespread" labor law violations. Tons of snow cut California's droughts in half. BetterHelp settles after sharing user therapy info with Facebook. Minecraft's next update gets a name.

Extras: On TikTok and Politics

Musings on the current state of TikTok and political "discourse" in the Untied States, especially regarding national security.

The Metaverse is on Life Support

OpenAI opens up their AI. Trains are really having a horrifying moment. US politicians love to hate TikTok. Meta ain't doing so hot with the metaverse.

Extras: Good Faith Nuance

Today, I've recorded a (whoops, kinda longish) ramble about how I approach difficult topics with nuance by assuming good faith and ignoring the unnecessary noise from... certain parts of the "conversation". Enjoy!

Australians Eat the Sun

Solar power in Australia is going hard. A Florida man had so much child porn it was measured in tons. The US Marshal Service got super owned. SNAP benefits are about to be a lot less helpful.

Express Cocaine Delivery

UPS drivers get an express delivery to prison. Mickey Mouse has a new sheriff. Everyone is doing AI in the dumbest ways possible. And y'all? It's time to talk about salmon.

Stuff Kept Happening

I was only gone for a week. Why did it all happen? Anyway, the Mormon Church has bread. The Dilbert guy sucks but we knew that. Elon sucks, too. Jimmy Carter is saying goodbye. And like just a lot more.

Storm's a-brewin'

A big ol' storm system is going to sweep the continental US. Bing's AI is extremely sassy. DOJ is digging further into Apple antitrust stuff. Also, a quick programming note.

200,000 Cadbury Creme Eggs

A man with a plan nearly pulled off the heist of the century. Rust is going to resume filming despite manslaughter charges. Ohio residents are rightfully angry. Twitter is basically just Elon now.

Extras: Hot (ish) AI Take

Video: a few minutes of me rambling about where I think we're going with AI and why I think this current era of ChatGPT / image generation AI is really just a toy

Love was made up by Hallmark to sell cards

Big storms a-comin'. Also its not aliens, Biden hates architecture, teen girls are dealing with unprecedented garbage and more.

Fine, I'll talk about the balloons

It really is a lot of balloons. The Ohio train disaster is not okay. Tech layoffs passed a quarter million in January. Cops already trashed an accountability tool. The sun is going buckwild.

Umbrella Corp is Real

The layoffs never end. Elon fired an engineer because they told him he annoys people. A reporter was arrested for reporting. Neuralink is mishandling pathogens and more.

A slightly less happy place

Disney lays off 7,000. Nintendo showed off some games. Netflix is really doing it. The UK government cares deeply about Call of Duty.

Here's our AI - Don't Trust It

Microsoft has a new AI but they say you shouldn't trust it. Mark Zuckerberg wants to get teens in his virtual world. Zoom laid of 1,300 people and BP is doing a "bad PR" any% speedrun

The Bard's College

Google and Microsoft race. People really seem to hate electrical substations. Twitter's premium service is not doing numbers. Even AI Seinfeld got cancelled.

Extras: Bardic Inspiration

Well, they're doing it. Google and Microsoft are both racing to the AI-powered finish line.

Not talking about that stupid balloon

They found a very big, very old cave. Also, Elon found not guilty. Blizzard got a slap on the wrist. Everyone is doing their best ChatGPT impersonation and more.

A whole lotta earnings

A groundhog didn't quite make it. Lots of $40 Billion (with a "B") and AI is gonna start writing intelligent marketing spam.

We found it!

I mean, "we" didn't but they found that capsule in Australia. Also Google got rekt, Apex Mobile is gone and more.

Someone stole a gorilla

Someone stole a cast iron gorilla statue. Also Elon is in a bad way with paying people, King of the Hill is coming back and more.

A giant fucking boulder

A giant boulder strikes a house in Hawaii. TikTok and congress get frisky. The Fed is doing what they love.

Heated seats for Tesla by way of fire

A Tesla catches fire outta nowhere. Memphis police unit disbanded. Also history gets older.

Lots of COP STUFF

Cops are doing a lot of things but not a lot of it is good things. Chevron buys back a lot of stock because thats what cool cats do.

YouTube University

Get college credits from YouTube. Also school admins ignored warnings, fast food companies spend money to not spend money, and more.